You're better off finding a trusted civilian who'll listen to your (what usually are very amusing) existential crises, and maintaining a lifestyle where your body and mind are allowed to perform at peak proficiency. Sorry, I hope that didn't come out sounding all preachily privileged because, you know: You are perfect just the way you are! And get yourself a hobby. Animals are good to have around, too. But please don't pay hard-earned cash money to be told to eat a salad once in a while. Mom told you to eat your vegetables, probably many times, and for free even.
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